I'm Turning Fifty!

By Lisa Lickel

What I've accomplished pre-fifty:

·         Got married and raised two pretty nifty kids

·         Enjoyed my college degree in history by living local history

·         Visited the 49 continental states

·         Published three novels and a great load of other stuff

·         Lived in a really cool house with a garden and grapes and lily of the valley all over

·         Learned to like venison over beef and ice-fished bluegills over catfish. Still working on the asparagus.

What's on the Bucket List before the next fifty closes:

·         Hold a grandbaby

·         Help the kids move One Last Time

·         Move ourselves to the farm (as in, not the funny, but our own)

·         Sign a half-dozen more contracts for novels

·         Figure out how to use a smart phone

·         Use my new passport for a country not attached to America

How 'bout you? Got any burning bucket list desires?

WHEN IT’S TIME TO CHANGE, YOU’VE GOT TO REARRANGE

By Marie Tschopp

Spring is on its way, and, once again, I am on a diet. I’ve cut way back on my food intake and have lost a whopping two (count 'em two!) pounds. I think my scale just snickered.

I hear losing weight at the speed of snails is a by-product of growing older. As I discovered other age-related side effects, I did what anybody in my situation would do—I wrote a song about it.

Yesterday Revisited

(To the tune of "Yesterday" by the Beatles.)

Yesterday

AARP seemed so far away

But now my hair is turning gray

And I stockpile jars of Oil of Olay.

Suddenly
A hot flash comes over me

And I start to sweat profusely.

Hot flashes come so suddenly.

Where did my neck go?

I don't know, the mirror won't say.

I sense something's wrong

How I long for yesterday.

Yesterday

Life was such an easy game to play

Now Metamucil starts my day.

Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Turn back the clock to yesterday.

I am changing, but with help from Preference by L’Oreal and Spanx, I think I’ll be okay. Besides, no one ever stays the same, except God. He never changes. He is always the same, yesterday, today, and tomorrow. In the crazy times we live in, isn’t that nice to know?

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. (Hebrews 13:8 NIV)